Galactic Games
by rebel scum
Summary: Umm...Bunch of my favorite Star Wars characters enduring the worst possible torture...my friends ^_^


~Show takes place in the Geonosian Arena minus the Geonosians~  
  
Host- Hello and welcome to our show! It doesn't have a title yet so you'll have to wait for that but generally it's just a flat out random show! We can do anything! Uhh, ok, I'm done, lets start.START!  
  
Jami- TA-DA! * Runs into Arena*  
  
Obi-Wan- So ummm. Why exactly are we doing this?  
  
Jami- 'Cause it's fun, yo!  
  
Host- Any competition suggestions?  
  
Miranda- *Sets a Kiwi on the ground * Defeat the Kiwi!  
  
Host- Ok! Any takers?  
  
Anakin- *Pulls out lightsaber, tries to stab it. * It won't go through! *Keeps trying * Host- Well. As we move across the arena we will see what other events are going on.  
  
Anakin- Forget that. I want to go too!  
  
*All follow over to where Jami is standing and arguing with some Tusken Raiders. *  
  
Jami-Now see here yo, if you're gonna shoot somethin' you need a better gun. And while you're at it, your choice of clothing has room for change.  
  
T.Raiders- Uhhhh Uhhhh Uhhh!  
  
Kristen- Umm, Jami. Jami!  
  
Jami- What does ugly bunny want?  
  
Kristen- You might want to.umm. how can I put it .RUN!  
  
*Raiders come after Jami*  
  
Anakin- AUGHHH! * goes and kills all Tuskens *  
  
Jami- That's cool yo! Can I see you lightsaver?  
  
Kristen joy Miranda Melissa Kerry Shannon Rachael- NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!  
  
Melissa- You'll hurt yourself  
  
Kristen- Or someone else!  
  
*Out of nowhere a nexu pounces on Obi-Wan *  
  
Obi-Wan- AUGHH! Get it off me! * Nexu licks him*  
  
Joy- Oh, thanks! You found Tahiri! I wondered were she went.  
  
* Puts leash back on nexu and drags it away *  
  
Obi-Wan- That thing has a name!?!? Joy- Of course it does! It's a sweet little kitty.  
  
Obi-Wan- She's mental  
  
Qui-Gon- You can't talk, padawan.  
  
Melissa- Don't insult him!  
  
Qui-Gon- You gonna do something about it? Melissa- Yeah! * Both draw lightsabers (A/N I really don't know where Melissa got the lightsaber) *  
  
Host- Uh Ok. We'll be back after we get this settled. ****  
Are you stressed? Need something relaxing to do? Try some meditation  
at Yoda's Yoga!  
Yoda- Relieve your stress I will.  
Come now for a great deal on a membership. ***** Host- And we are surprisingly all still alive!  
  
* Camera pans onto Melissa and Qui-Gon wrapped in bandages. Obi-Wan is laughing *  
  
Obi-Wan- That was funny!  
  
Qui-Gon * Glares at him * * Camera follows host over to the edge of the arena to where 4 sleds are sitting. *  
  
Host- Our next event will be to see who can sled down the seats here in the arena. Are sled pilots will be the pit-droid, Dum-4, TK-421, Palpatine, and uhhhhhh. let me think, Lando Calrissian!  
  
Rachael- Anyone up for a smoothie?  
  
Miranda- I want kiwi!  
  
* Sled 'pilots' begin their descent * Host- *As Lando and TK-421 collide* Owww! That hurts. I guess they're out.  
  
* Emperor finally falls off sled *  
  
Host- Well it looks as though Dum-4 has won even though he never managed to get entirely on the sled and was dragged all the way down! Hmmm. We need a punishment competition for the losers.  
  
Shannon- Get some tutus and make 'em do ballet!  
  
Kerry- I don't know. That could be scary. * Cringes *  
  
Shannon- Yes, but funny * Hands Lando, TK-421, and Palpatine a tutu *  
  
* All struggle to put them on *  
  
TK-421- Mine wont fit over my armor.  
  
Kerry- Then wear it on your head or something. Shannon- Are the rest of you ready?  
  
Lando- Not Yet!  
  
Kerry- We'll wait until you're ready.  
  
Palpatine- *mutters * You'll be waiting a long time for that.  
  
Host- Ok, dance!  
*All attempt to pirouette around. Palpatine jumps and kicks Lando down,  
but TK-421 turns around and accidently hits Palpatine, knoking him out. * Host- TK wins! Now you can leave.  
  
TK-421- Wha.  
  
Host- Leave.  
  
Joy- Tahiri! She got away again! Anakin- I'll get her. * Leaves and comes back with a pile of t-bone steaks. Quickly hands them to Padme * Now stand there and call the nexu.  
  
Padme- What!?!?  
  
Obi-Wan- You're using her as bait!  
  
Anakin- Well I certainly don't want to get mauled by that thing. And anyway, she's just holding the bait.  
  
Padme- Why can't Joy do it?  
  
Anakin- I don't want her to get mauled either.  
  
Padme- And you want me to?  
  
Anakin- Yeah.  
  
Jar-Jar- How Wude!  
  
All- * Glare at Jar-Jar *  
  
Joy- * Leaves arena *  
  
Host- Hmmmm. I know! Sumo Wrestling! Any volunteers? Ok then. Vader and Jami!  
  
Vader- *Breathes heavily *  
  
Jami- I'm gonna win dude! *Runs to the ring * * Match starts. Vader makes forcefield around self. But, Jami pulls out ysalamiri. Shoves Vader. Vader shoves back. Shoves Vader. Vader shoves back. Continues until finally Vader uses the force to lift Jami out of the ring. (The ysalamiri got lost in the shoving process) *  
  
Jami- Darn you. * Blaster fire rings out. Jar-Jar screams and falls to the ground dead. *  
  
Mara- Got him! First shot!  
  
Joy- Thanks a lot!  
  
Host- Ok, commercial break so we can get this cleaned up. ****  
For that smooth, mellifluous taste that never diminishes, try an Ani- Kan Candy Bar! You'll never rue the day you tried this coherent chocolate mass! ****  
  
Host- No! Not Ready!  
  
Camera Man- Sorry  
  
****  
Now for an excerpt from your new constitution: We the people of the Evil Empire, In order to destroy the New Re. *Stormtroopers that appear to be running from something run in front of the camera. Wedge is coming after them wildly shooting a blaster. * Wedge- Bleed and Die Yub-Yub! * Commercial blinks out * ****  
  
Kerry-What was with all the vocab words in the first commercial?  
  
Kristen- * Shrugs * *Wedge enters arena *  
  
Joy- Wedge!  
  
Kerry- Everybody loves Wedge!  
  
TK-421 (yes he's back) -Everybody?  
* Corran enters Arena *  
  
Kerry- Corran!  
  
Joy- Everybody loves Corran!  
  
TK-421- Once again.  
* Wes enters arena *  
  
Kerry- Who are you?  
  
Joy- Wes! Everybody loves Wes!  
  
TK-421- Ummmm. * Palpatine enters arena *  
  
Joy & Kerry- Everybody..  
  
Jami- We know! Loves Palpatine!  
  
TK-421- *confused now *  
  
Joy- A, no. not exactly.  
  
Kerry- Everybody hates Palpatine!  
  
Vader- * breathes heavily *  
  
Isard - NO THEY DON'T !  
  
Palpatine- Ysanne! * Those two leave *  
  
Rachael- Gross.  
  
Melissa- VERY gross.  
  
Shannon- Can we get on with it?  
  
Miranda- No! We must make a treaty with the cheesecake!  
  
Kristen- Ok, Wedge, you and Janson go. * Two approach the cheesecake *  
  
Wedge- Remember, diplomacy first.  
  
Janson- Diplomacy means saying something soothing as you pull the trigger right? * Pulls out blaster *  
  
Miranda- * Throws herself in front of the cheesecake * Sworn to protect the cheesecake!  
Meanwhile on the other end of the arena.  
  
Anakin- Have you found Tahiri yet, Padme?  
  
Padme- No *scowls at him *  
  
Anakin- OHHH KRISTY!!!  
  
Jami- *mockingly* OHHH UGLY BUNNY!!!  
  
Kristen- *glares at them * What?  
  
Anakin- Here. *hands her the t-bones that Padme was holding* I don't like you either.  
  
Kristen- Hmpphh  
* Camera travels over to where rest of Rogue Squadron enters*  
  
Myn Donos- Are you guys gonna be here long?  
  
Corran- I hope not.  
  
Myn- Ok, we'll be uhhh.painting our X-wings. *They turn to leave *  
  
Kerry-Wait!  
  
Joy- Gavin!  
  
Kerry & Joy- Everybody loves Gavin!  
  
Wes- Oh Boy! You get to stay too!  
  
Corran- Have to you mean. Those two will make you. * points at Joy and Kerry*  
  
Wes- Uh-huh, I think they have this thing for us great X-wing pilots.*grins *  
  
Kerry- *sarcastically* How could you tell?  
  
Joy- *shakes head *  
  
Host- I'm ready for another commercial.BREAK! ***  
Jaina- Hi everybody! Ummmm. I'm supposed to advertise something. * looks around. runs off screen and comes back with an Oreo and Lowbacca* Try a Wookiee Cookie today! Lowbacca- [But not if you're a Wookiee cause then you'd be a cannibal.] RP- No Wookiees were harmed in the making of this commercial. ***  
  
Joy- Add-vertice-mint. Cool  
  
Miranda- Another cool word!  
  
Host- Ummm.Now we shall play ping-pong! With alligators! On the table! Dum4 against the possessed kids!  
  
PK- We hate ping-pong we hate Dum4!  
  
Dum4- * little chatter noise pit droids make *  
  
*Match starts. Ping-pong ball eventually hits Dum4 on the nose and he curls up*  
  
Melissa- Wow. The possessed kids can even win things they hate!  
  
PK- We hate you!  
  
Wedge- They hate a lot don't they?  
  
Shannon- NAH DUH CAPTIAN OBVIOUS!  
  
Rachael- You must have been in a different galaxy to miss that!  
  
Wes- Well, we kinda were.  
  
Rachael- Oh. Yeah. *** Viewer discrepancy advised. Some material may not be suitable for children. RP- Next time you see one of these: *holds up a picture of Kristen * Please take your children indoors and call 1-800-OHGOD-GETITOFF. It recently escaped from a zoo on Corellia. Thank You ***  
  
Jami- *shrieks really loud* THER IT IS!!!! GET IT QUICK BEFORE IT GETS ME!!! *runs in the opposite direction *  
  
Host- GUARDS!!! *nothing happens*  
  
Kristen- Muahahaha, I killed all the guards before I came in. You are all doomed now! *more evil laughter *  
*Suddenly, Joy, who apparently left the arena a few minutes ago, speeds  
into the arena in a jeep with 4 stormtroopers.*  
  
Joy-GET HER! *Stormtroopers tackle Kristen , tie her up, and drag her out of the arena*  
  
Kristen- This won't be the last of this, you here me!  
  
Joy- It might be, if you don't start being nicer to me in your story. *Grins* It might be anyway. I feel like being mean. *evil laughter ensues, this time from Joy*  
  
Host- I'm scared, I'm leaving now.  
  
Melissa- Namarie!  
  
Jami- Make it a great day, or not, the choice is yours!  
  
Ok, end for now. More when I feel like it.Which will probably be soon. ^_^ 


End file.
